Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
