IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
