Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize
