I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
