i would punch a child for taco bell
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize
