If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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