I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I stole a fireplace last night.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
