The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I would ride that face into the sunset
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
