Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
