okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
