pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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