North Korea, Best Korea!
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
