what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
