we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize