i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
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