No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
