I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
