i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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