ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Pooping to opera.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
