Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
