There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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