you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
