i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
