she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
there is puke in my bra ... again
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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