..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
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