I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
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