Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I just found puke in my bra..
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize