Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
