I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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