So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
