oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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