I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize