So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
