we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
