when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
