Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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