I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Well I just put wine in my tea
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
