I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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