would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
