Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
