hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
