ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
