Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
