Pappa wants mamma naked
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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