I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
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