did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize