I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
