We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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