oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
