yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I need moral support for this bender
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
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